Gloves and their magic

Confession: the person I’ve OM’d with the most never wore gloves. We were close friends when we first OM’d, and while we were trying to be mindful of the container, neither of us were much for following rules.

My first experience with gloves was a few months later. And while I don’t know if it was crucial for my own sense of safety, I was appreciative of them. I barely knew the guy, and he was about to have his hands on my pussy.

Fast forward to when I found some local people to OM with. By this time my relationship to the container had changed- the gloves were now mandatory with anyone not my romantic partner (our OM coach said this was ok). This was not always well received by my new “main stroker”. He always obliged, but expressed frustration over their awkwardness and particularly how it made it difficult for him to feel me.

A couple weeks ago he grabbed the wrong gloves- they were too big and the OM was comedic at times, frustrating at times, and also still yummy at times. I reminded him that the gloves were mandatory, and that he might consider connecting with others in the OMing community if wearing gloves was continuing to be a challenge for him.

Last week he brought the right gloves, but still the glove issue showed itself. After making a request for him to soften his stroke he said, “I can’t feel you through these gloves.”  I invited him to let go of the tactile feeling of his finger, move to his energetic body, stay tuned into my requests, and simply follow the flow of my energy. I reminded him that although he may not be able to feel my clit, my clit was feeling him. Stay with the energy.

Afterwards he said that was the best OM he’d experienced yet. And it was damn good for me too. It was an exchange that demonstrated that it’s not gloves that get in the way, it’s one’s ideas about the gloves and one’s disconnect from the energy body that get in the way. Whatever you think is to “blame” for your less then desired experience- explore that. Meet it head on. Go deeper.

I love that he had such a great OM. I love that he got to experience first hand what OMing is about. I love that he was able to let go of his glove obsession and feel deeply into his energetic experience. The magic of orgasm isn’t in a finger. It’s so much larger then that.

As awkward and impersonal as gloves may seem to be, there is a method to their madness. There is wisdom in why they are part of the container. In my experience, there is wisdom in every.single.part of the OM container. It may take years for the wisdom to be revealed. Be patient. Keep bringing attention back to the body. Orgasm is waiting patently for your arrival to her presence.


OMing: the disney lands of meditation

Oh Om’ing, how do I love thee? Let me count the ways.

After my OM this morning I realized that OMing is a like being in the disney lands of meditation. (Disney land- in all the best ways, of course 😉 )  For those who have been OMing for awhile, I don’t think I need to explain that, and I’m not sure I can. There is so much to be in awe of, to be amazed by, to enjoy, when communing with presence. Add in a clitoris and all its nerve endings, and weeeeeeeeeeeee

Life on the meditation cushion can also be disney land-ish. That is certainly my experience anyway. (ok, hell, life is often  like disney land for me). But sometimes, meditating on that cushion can just lead to more more spinning out. Without a somatic interplay, the mind can get restless, and do what it does best: think. The mind can’t help but want to compare, contrast, judge- better and worse and all that. That can be noticed, but when I go into the content of comparing and contrasting, it keeps me from enjoying the moment, as I have to “leave” the present moment (with  attention anyway) and reflect upon something different then is happening. When I keep attention on what is here, there isn’t better, or worse, there is just “this”.

There is so much “in this”, why would I want to be anywhere else?  The main answer I get is habit and unfamiliarity. Culturally speaking we’re taught to be fixated on doings, on what is going “out there”, on analysis, on figuring out. We get lost in activity, people, places, things- i.e. our thoughts about all of that. So yeah, we’re a culture of people living in our heads.  In the process we leave behind our bodies. How many of us have gone off into mental la-la land, while our bodies patiently await for attention to “come back down”?

One of the beauties of OMing is that it centers around the body in a most overt way. So, when we OM we’re invited back into our bodies. We’re invited into disney land. We’re invited to notice the swells, the nothing, the discomfort, the gasps, the moans, the boredom. We’re invite to notice the fear, the sadness, the anger, the bliss, the disorientation, and the pleasure.

If we can leave behind what we think would should be experiencing, as well as what we want to be experiencing, we will leave behind comparing and contrasting. If we can keep our attention on that single finger, stroking our clit, we can stay in disney land. It might be the boredom of the lines. Or it might be the Matterhorn at maximum speed. Like disney land, we never know what’s around the corner during an OM. But we know that it’s bound to be filled with sensations of some kind- aliveness of some variety- and quite often orgasms of varying degrees. If we stay in disney land, inside the gates, we are in for adventure and a multitude of rides.

OMing constantly invites us to put our attention back into the body. Back to the body. Back too the body. And it uses the most sensitive spot in the female anatomy to do so. And it brings up the most vulnerable aspects of our humanity while doing so. When the container is set right, we get to truly experience the vastness of a disney land experience in the score of 15 minutes.

In this morning’s OM I got to leave my mental monkey in so many profound ways. I experienced the full presence of my clit, what she wanted, and the ability to speak on her behalf.  I watched my breathing transform into short pants as an orgasm grabbed my being unexpectedly in the most delicious of ways. I noticed my mind come in and some holding come into my body as I sensed a climax about to take over me , and some resistance to that. I felt my body jump and gasps fall out of my mouth as that holding released. I experienced wave after wave of sensations from my toes to my head and back down again. I felt a surge of tenderness erupt and tears well in my eyes and my heart ache. I noticed pictures and thoughts arise and engage my attention for brief moments until my attention submitted once again to my body. I experienced confidence of making requests, and then experienced having what I wanted.

I hate to compare and contrast, but I’m doing to anyway. Today’s OM was just fun, easy and full of pleasure. Afterwards my stroker exclaimed, “That was the best OM yet!” However, while our OM last week was still filled with moments of delight and orgasmic yum, it was also awkward and comical in moments, and  over all a bit mediocre. And yet-still amazing because when is not being in presences not?

Each OM ride is going to be different. Keep coming back to the body, and your orgasm is surely to reveal itself. Not in the way that you may want it to, but in the way that it is.



I can feel my orgasm rise and fall as I feel undulations. And within that, it’s like something “in my pussy” opens and closes.  i wonder how apparent it is to an eye, or to a finger, or energetically. I imagine it’s subtle, except that to me it’s intense. And I don’t even know what’s actually happening  ‘down there’ anyway! The openings and closings of my pussy, of what feels like my clit, are intense. Can a clit open and close? I find all these questions entertaining. And a bit unnecessary, but that’s the mind…

Most of these thoughts are coming now, as i write about the experience. But some showed up during- mainly that whatever is happening is such.a.mystery!

It seems that my clit, or that the energy of my clit, was opening and closing, but whether that’s true or not I don’t know so  I just leaned into the energy that was opening and closing. The energetic expression was illusive yet quite intense, so I just stayed with the mystery.

I kept leaning into what seemed like openings and closings. And i felt. And i felt. And i felt some more. And the energy went up, up, up… like the opening and closing energy drews upwards, to the space above the clit and pussy. It felt a bit like my orgasm was pulling upwards, and my pleasure was riding around me. And hovering above…   Like the opening and closing reached to this hovering spot. The orgasm grew, and reached toward the hovering “spot.”

This wasn’t the first time I’d experienced this. It’s been pretty common the last 6 months, but I got to study it pretty intently today. I’m particularly fascinated by it- by the entire mystery of whatever is actually happening. And I’m ok that I actually have no idea. Probably because it feels so deliciously amazing.