My first “real” om partner (my gf and i gave it a half hazard attempt a few years prior) was a sexual predator who took advantage of my orgasm/OM hormones. I was so unaware as to the hows and whys of the nest. (We’d been OMing for 6-9 months before we decided to get trained) I was so new and uneducated as to the effect of hormones and the vigilance centers… had no idea that my orgasm high was effecting my ability to make useful distinctions. and that in the process I was turning to pleasure/feeling good as an escape from the abuse i was in the middle of but couldn’t clearly name or get out of.
I’m utterly grateful for the trainers – they really helped me understand the nest and helped to create useful distinctions. If i had continued OMing without training I can’t imagine… I currently have a great OM partner (who was trained by OM trainers) that I’ve been OMing with for over a year, and it’s been a great part of my healing.
Today after our OM i was left with such gratitude that it sparked me to write the first paragraph. Particularly because in today’s OM i was consciously noticing how my vigilance centers are so relaxed these days, my inner manager so quiet, and how that allows for the orgasmic nature of my body to be so fully experienced, in such subtle ways. My body is so receptive, and I have deep gratitude for that after the violent relationship I experienced.
The OM nest, when does well, provides such an amazing environment where it is clear that my orgasm is always mine and that there will never be “tit for tat”. My heart and my pussy feel free to soar together- to their highest peaks and into all hidden caverns- not from a place of performance or to reinforce various sense of self identities or for “other”. This allowance of my system’s full expression as valid is invaluable. ❤